we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
