its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
The best revenge is premature balding
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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