Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize