I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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