Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize