Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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