Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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