I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
