Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
it glows. i had to have it.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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