I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
