ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Randomize