Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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