Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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