There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
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Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
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I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
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