I'm laying in your front yard are you home
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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