the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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