no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize
