i permit you to call me
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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