woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
