I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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