She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
