I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
