Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Randomize
