You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
