Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
