Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
