and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
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