he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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