Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
