i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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