We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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