There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
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