does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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