wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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