She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Randomize