So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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