I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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