why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize