I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize