I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I have already put on my inside pants.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
