32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
