even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
