My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
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