I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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