i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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