Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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