I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
