I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
