Sry I called you an 8
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
