Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
