I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
